Fat Bottom Girl Said What

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Archive for the tag “chemistry”

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chemistry

Chemistry.  So amazing, yet so perplexing.  I have been obsessing about it recently.  The topic came up Saturday night, when I was chatting with a friend.  Here’s what I want to know from you, dear WP friends:

1.  Is chemistry something that you either have or you don’t?  Meaning, can it be “manufactured” during the course of a relationship, or does it have to be there from the beginning?

2.  If you believe it can be “manufactured”, does it quickly wane because it wasn’t there right away?

3.  Do you think a relationship is doomed if you have no chemistry with someone?

4.  What are your experiences with relationships in where there’s been chemistry/no chemistry?

I have a ton of other questions, but am so looking forward to reading replies, and generating some talk about this topic!  Hope you are willing to participate!

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Guest Posting at Saved In Drafts

When Sophie, from over at Saved In Drafts, asked kindly if I would guest post, I told her hell yeah!! She seems to think I cuss a lot, and I would fucking agree with that statement. She is from across the ocean, from that country where they have tea, and drink ales, and eat fish and chips. I really don’t know much about England, and hopefully, someday soon, Sophie will fill me in on what the hell bangers and mash are!!  I am pretty sure it’s some sort of food, but it may be some freaky sex shit too.  Either way, head on over and check out my post, Chemistry: A Formula for Disaster, and stick around and check out her blog. I love reading about her newlywed adventures, and think how she met her husband was quite serendipitous!

Mars and Venus, or is it Uranus and Venus??

So I get it, men and women have two different styles of communicating.   Women communicate and men don’t.   Okay, so that wasn’t exactly fair.  Let’s say men communicate long enough to get a woman hooked and then they’re done, and the woman is left wondering what happened to stop it.

Guys, be sure and chime in here if you think I’m wrong about this.  This is something which is quite perplexing to me and I am always up for learning more about the male mind and what makes it tick.  Let me just throw a scenario at you—new guy, been talking almost two weeks, finally met last Friday night.  We have touched on numerous subjects, and he has shared many, very personal things with me.  This surprised me at first because he was so open, but I can roll with it.  I tend to have that effect on people, and I figure the more comfortable he feels sharing things with me, the better off we are if this is headed towards “relationship” status.

Anyway, lots of personal information, seems very honest, etc, we meet last Friday night and the chemistry was all there in person too, and we even touched on being open to exploring a relationship.  I talked to him Saturday morning before he went to work, we texted a bit on Saturday night, I sent him a text on Sunday, to which I received no reply, and called him and left a message.  Basically, I haven’t heard from him since Saturday night.  I’m thinking WTF??  Is this normal?  We totally click, and agree on this fact, even in person all the chemistry is there.  (For those of you who internet date, you know that sometimes you can click over messages and texts, but have no chemistry in person.)

I am at a loss. I am now refusing to text him, or call him.   Yeah, I’m really tough like that.  Oh, hell!  Who am I kidding??  This guy seems so great that when he does get ahold of me, I will probably act like it’s no big deal that he hasn’t talked to me for days.  Which to him, maybe it isn’t a big deal.  Maybe he doesn’t think anything of it.  He does have an extremely demanding job, which he is on call for and usually only gets about 12 hours between shifts.  Friday he managed to not get called in, so he hopped in his truck and drove the hour and fifteen minutes to come meet me in person.  I am in no way making excuses, I just know how guys can be extremely one-track minded.

I do think this guy likes me and is interested in me, so why am I getting so freaked out by the lack of communication?  At my age I don’t really want someone up in my shit all the time, and I am sure he feels the same.  Plus, we aren’t officially dating at this point, so should I expect him to have daily contact??  Maybe I only expect the daily contact because I got that the first week.  Seriously, if I’m dating someone, then yes, I do expect to have daily contact with them.  But for now I think this thing is supposed to be casual, though I think if we were about 15 years younger, we would be so up this shit it would be unbelievable!!

I am going to attempt to play it cool.  He is aware I am quite interested in him, and I believe the feeling is mutual.  At this point what more can I do?  I have to stand back, let go of my control issues, and let him take the lead.  He is the man after all.  And what a huge, smokin’ hot, hunk of a man he is!! 😉

Like I said—please comment and let you know what you think!!  I would love to hear everyone’s opinions!

 

 

 

 

Old School

Tomorrow I am going to my hometown to attend a wrestling tournament. It’s not that I’m extremely interested in the wrestling, but the guy who I am going to see is. He wrestled in high school, and now his son wrestles and he coaches.  He and I went to high school together.  We weren’t in the same class, he’s a year older than me, but we were in band together, and we went to a fairly small high school.  I suppose you could say we were friends in high school.  Friends with chemistry, maybe.  Definitely not “friends with benefits”, and we never dated.  I didn’t really date in high school, but that’s a whole different blog post! 

Anyway, we have been FB friends for awhile, but started communicating again about 6 months ago, mainly IMing and texting.  We haven’t even talked on the phone.  We’re both pretty busy–me with my 12 hours away from home per day and my son, and him with non-traditional work hours and being a very dedicated father of 3.  But, we have found a little time to flirt by text.  We have discussed getting together numerous times over the months, but it has never happened.  Now, he will only be an hour away, as opposed to 3, so I am going to go see him.

This will be the first time in about 20 years we’ve seen each other in person.  I had a huge crush on him in high school–which my big mouth told him about recently!  He said he never knew.  I did come right out and ask him if he thought we had chemistry in high school and he agreed that we did.  I asked him if he thinks we’ll still have chemistry.  He thinks we will. 

I don’t come across many guys I have chemistry with.  It will be interesting to see if after 20 some years if he still trips my trigger.  Things are a lot different now, considering one of the main reasons I think he’s pretty hot now is because he’s such a great dad, and in high school I might have thought he was hot because he had a cool car!  Just kidding about the car–I have never been that shallow.

I will let you know how it goes!

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