Last year I did a New Year’s Eve post in which I made a list of all the things I wanted in 2013: more sex, vacation, more readers, a built-in asshole indicator, just to name a few. As the year draws to a close, in preparation of writing another New Year’s Eve post, and starting a Fat Bottom Girl tradition, I read over it.
I am happy to report that I have gotten 3 out of 8 things I wanted in 2013:
1. Vacation– a couple of days in San Antonio. I learned a lot of lessons on that trip, one being that if you’re dating an asshole, don’t expect him to keep his dick in his pants while you’re out of town on vacation. Also, I figured out I don’t really like to travel alone, because it’s got to be a lot more fun when you have someone there to point and laugh at people with. I am definitely taking more vacation in 2014!
2. More laughter. I’m pretty sure I’ve gotten more of this, and a lot of it’s due to some of you bloggers. You guys can be some funny motherfuckers! Yeah, you know who you are. Seriously, sometimes I have to actually cover my mouth while I’m pissing away time at work reading blogs, so my co-workers won’t hear me chortling and guffawing over some of the hilarious shit you write! (God, chortling and guffawing, aren’t those fucking cool words??)
3. I have more readers. As of this posting, I am now up to 198! I have absolutely no idea how this happened, because I still feel like some third-rate word hack when I compare myself to a lot of you, but I want to thank you for reading! (Which reminds me, I apologize if the checks I promised to send for your follow haven’t reached you yet. I swear I sent them! That damn post office needs to get their shit together!)
So as 2013 draws to a close, I didn’t get all the sex I wanted, there’s still never enough time to do everything I need to do, I’m still not satisfied with everything, and I am still trying to perfect the built-in asshole indicator, but my year is ending on a high note! First of all, because my son is coming back to live with me again! Things didn’t quite work out like everyone thought they would, and after more soul-searching, all involved decided it was best for him to be back with me. This makes me a very happy Mom!! All of it probably a hard, but necessary, learning experience for my son, and for me too.
Secondly, I have met someone. He makes me laugh, he’s a great communicator, he’s talented, intelligent, considerate, and he seems to get me and my sometimes nerdy ways. Plus, bonus! He’s a smokin’ hottie. I have no idea where it’s going, and right now I’m trying really hard not to care, and to just enjoy the ride. Everything with him is different than it’s ever been with any other guy, and in my book, that’s a good thing. That’s a damn good thing.
Raise your glasses Fat Bottom Girl followers!! Here’s hoping you get what you need in 2014, because in the immortal words of the Rolling Stones, you can’t always get what you want.