Fat Bottom Girl Said What

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Archive for the month “December, 2011”

Serendipity

“If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid.”  –Epictetus 

I just caught the end of the movie “Serendipity” tonight, and one of the characters refers to the above quote in the movie.  I don’t remember ever hearing it before when I’ve watched the movie, but my ears must have been open to hearing it tonight.  There’s many things I could say about the movie, and the theory of serendipity, but I just can’t tonight.  I am already sad because I am here alone, as my son is with his father and not sitting here on the floor playing Legos.

So, I am just going to leave you with some more quotes from Epictetus, as he must have been a very smart dude!  I guess that’s why he was a philosopher.

“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.”

“What concerns me is not the way things are, but rather the way people think things are.”

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Bah Humbug

It came to me all of a sudden this morning while drying my hair. I know why I don’t really like Christmas. It’s because of divorce. First it was my parent’s divorce, and then my divorce, and now my brother’s divorce. Now don’t get me wrong–I don’t want to be married to my ex-husband anymore. That isn’t what this is about. It’s about scheduling. Christmas is lost among figuring out who needs to be where, at what time, with which parent, or which parent’s new spouse’s family. There’s only so many days during the holiday season. How many Christmases should a kid have to participate in??

My slow descent into my own personal hell has begun. After I deliver my son to his dad on Christmas morning I will most likely return home to spend the rest of the day with my mother and brother. Then it will be onto my couch and back to back Glee DVR’s.  And when I run out of those I will hope that I can watch White Christmas numerous times. It’s possible I won’t move off the couch until it’s time to go back to work.

Isn’t Christmas great?

The Fat Lady Sings for Ty Pennington

I read yesterday that Extreme Makeover: Home Edition will be ending in January. After that they will be doing specials a couple times of year. Their last episodes will be building a bunch of new homes for people who lost theirs in the Joplin tornado.  I can’t say I’m sad to see this show go.  I haven’t watched it for years.  I think the last time was when they built the house for the wounded soldier and his family who lost their house in the Chapman, KS tornado. 

 I know people have gotten a “feel good” from this show for years, but that stopped for me a long time ago.  I think they had the right idea, but the way they went about it was insane.  Off the top of my head I can’t tell you what the average cost of one of these homes was, but I’m sure most of them were probably at least 1/2 to 3/4 of a million dollars.  Beautiful homes, with amazing features that made everyone gasp when they “move that bus”, but boy did reality set in for these families!  Basically, they set most of these families up for failure.  Many of them upper lower class, or maybe lower middle class, struggling to pay bills on a monthly basis already.  So of course it only makes sense to give them a house worth hundreds of thousands of dollars when their homeowner’s insurance and their taxes were already a struggle to pay!  And just for good measure let’s throw in a brand new vehicle that’s a total gas hog and the property taxes and insurance are outrageous on. 

It’s too bad they couldn’t have been a little smarter about the whole thing–smaller homes which wouldn’t cost so much to maintain or build equals more homes for people in need.  But that’s not the way Hollywood or the world seems to work anymore.  Bigger is always supposed to be better, isn’t it?  Not so much.

Too bad they didn’t take a lesson from Habitat for Humanity.  But no one wants to see a modest home being built by volunteers on a television show do they?

Old School

Tomorrow I am going to my hometown to attend a wrestling tournament. It’s not that I’m extremely interested in the wrestling, but the guy who I am going to see is. He wrestled in high school, and now his son wrestles and he coaches.  He and I went to high school together.  We weren’t in the same class, he’s a year older than me, but we were in band together, and we went to a fairly small high school.  I suppose you could say we were friends in high school.  Friends with chemistry, maybe.  Definitely not “friends with benefits”, and we never dated.  I didn’t really date in high school, but that’s a whole different blog post! 

Anyway, we have been FB friends for awhile, but started communicating again about 6 months ago, mainly IMing and texting.  We haven’t even talked on the phone.  We’re both pretty busy–me with my 12 hours away from home per day and my son, and him with non-traditional work hours and being a very dedicated father of 3.  But, we have found a little time to flirt by text.  We have discussed getting together numerous times over the months, but it has never happened.  Now, he will only be an hour away, as opposed to 3, so I am going to go see him.

This will be the first time in about 20 years we’ve seen each other in person.  I had a huge crush on him in high school–which my big mouth told him about recently!  He said he never knew.  I did come right out and ask him if he thought we had chemistry in high school and he agreed that we did.  I asked him if he thinks we’ll still have chemistry.  He thinks we will. 

I don’t come across many guys I have chemistry with.  It will be interesting to see if after 20 some years if he still trips my trigger.  Things are a lot different now, considering one of the main reasons I think he’s pretty hot now is because he’s such a great dad, and in high school I might have thought he was hot because he had a cool car!  Just kidding about the car–I have never been that shallow.

I will let you know how it goes!

Take This Job And. . .

I wish I knew what I wanted to be when I grow up. But I never want to grow up so much that I lose my fascination with the world. Some days I feel way too serious and responsible. Today was one of those days. My job has been kicking my butt this week. My job has been kicking my butt for a long time. My job gives nothing back to me. Don’t get me wrong–my job pays pretty well, and I have benefits. That’s not what I’m talking about. It’s more than just job satisfaction I’m looking for. I’m looking for a soul re-charge. My job gives me absolutely nothing for my soul. I’m certain this is why I feel so depleted. I am constantly exhausted because my soul is not full. My job only takes from my soul and never adds to it. The hardest job in the world is easy to do if it fills your soul.

With this ring. ..

So my ex-husband just proposed to his current girlfriend this weekend. I know all of this because my son tells me pretty much everything. This will be his third marriage, and we’ve only been divorced a little over 10 years. I have to admit that it bothers me a little bit. Not because he’s getting married, because that ship sailed a long time ago, but because I don’t have a significant other. I’ve had two significant relationships since my divorce–one with a married man and one with an emotional abuser.  Each of those relationships lasted between 3 and 4 years, so you can’t say that I don’t have longevity.  Smart-ass.  I was being sarcastic there.  It doesn’t matter if you have longevity with men who are either emotionally or physically unavailable or are abusive.  I just want there to be someone out there for me.  I think I deserve some good stuff.  Regardless of who I have loved, or the choices I’ve made and what people might think of them, I am a good person.  I’m a great mom–I’m fierce, I’m fun, I’m talented, and when I’m around life is never mundane.  Where’s the man who will realize how great I am and can put up with me??

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