Fat Bottom Girl Said What

When my ass talks, people listen.

Archive for the category “Poetry”

Disremembrance

stop_time_iii_by_vimark

The clock marks time

tick

tick

tick

it’s been long enough now

that I almost can’t recall

why I fell in love with you in the first place

Maybe it was your stellar acting skills

A regular Shakespeare of the long distance relationship

prancing on the stage

waiting for my applause from the front row

and you, merely

throwing me crumbs, always giving me excuses

of why you couldn’t give me actual time

More of the

tick

tick

tick

I chastise myself for holding on too long

ignoring what was staring me in the face

anxiety mounting

tearing at my fresh skin, newly healed

Your claws digging deeper

into the fresh carrion which was my

already abused heart

the wounds you left more devastating

because they were poisoned with the lie of love

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged dating, lies, long-distance relationships, love, narcissism, relationships | Leave a comment

Kanza – People of The South Wind

folhas_voadoras

Photo Credit: Paulo Borges

The wind howls

dirt eddies creating a haze,filling my eyes with grit

dead leaves circling in tiny tornadoes

plastic bags

a scourge on nature, plastered to fences

making otherworldly ghosts to dance in trees

I seek shelter from the keening, but solace never comes

for it is March in Kansas

and there is no peace to be found

not even in my own mind

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged Kansa, Kansas, Kanza, People of the south wind, wind | Leave a comment

Open Books

book

the book lies open in your lap

set aside

as I bend over you

to rub my nose, my lips

against the stubble on your cheek

needing to feel you physically

and express my love for all that you are

how many times each day

do I think in my head

“god I love this man”

which is as it should be

all of you is what anchors me

and heals me from all that has come before

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Relationships, Uncategorized and tagged imagination, love, muse, relationships

Pupa

cocoon

I am not the butterfly

but the chrysalis

after the butterfly has emerged

empty

void of feelings

the beauty contained within has flown away

leaving nothing but a shell

which dances in the breezes of life

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged depression, feelings, melancholy, where did all my feelings go?, Who in the fuck am I?

Fat Tuesday

mardigras

Ash Wednesday

was merely you stamping out your cigarette

and me standing there watching

as the last of the smoke escaped your lips

unable to give you up

for any sort of ridiculous religious conviction

atheist or otherwise

my sins paled in comparison to yours

and left me feeling pious and righteous

never worried about whose left hand I would be sitting at

when all was said and done

the food and the fucking both taste so much better

when someone tells you you can’t have them

so pour your communion wine into the dip of my shoulder

my belly button

and drink of life’s blood

drown out the trumpet sounds drifting through the windows

and toss aside all the beads

our Mardi Gras will never end

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged atheism, lovers, Mardi Gras, religion, sex

Agent Provocateur

undercover spy

private eye

double agent

mole

smooth criminal

schooled in espionage and capable of assuming various personalities

covert ops

surveillance

lurking

slinking

wiretapping

staking it out

But the jig is up, James Bond

you’ve been

found out

discovered

exposed

unveiled

recognized

No more pussy galore for you

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged concealing, love, lying, master of disguise, master of manipulation, relationships, untrustworthy

Water Safety

the water is closing in
but i keep flailing my arms
i try to will my legs to move
try to remind myself
that there are people who need me
i must fight to stay afloat
swim
i tell myself
swim
you pathetic, weak bitch
you haven’t survived this long
to go down without a fight
but
the shore is nowhere in sight
how can i save myself
if i can’t see the land
and
i wish you were here
to pull me out of the waves
but
the reality is
you can’t save me
you’re not my life preserver
or my personal flotation device
and
your own boat
threatens to capsize in stormy seas

*Originally posted on The Fat Bottom Bard

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged dealing with the effects of domestic violence, depression, drowning, PTSD, survival | Leave a comment

Busker

The song of you

is stuck in my head

It resonates like a tuning fork

I hum another tune

but it is drowned out by your melody

I want you to take your one man band elsewhere

Get it off my street corner

so I can allow another man’s song

to replace your lyric

which was filled with fables and broken promises

one_man_band_by_felixgi

Photo Credit: felixgi.deviantart.com

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged dating, love, relationships

Battle Weapons

sing me to sleep

your arms wrapped around me

kiss my cheek

my brow

as passionately as you kiss my lips

show me that hands are made for kindness

and words are meant to elevate

and maybe, just maybe

my sharp edges will be smoothed

I will lay down my weapons

and allow you a glimpse inside

before you turn tail and run

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Relationships, Uncategorized and tagged insecurities, relationships, trust

The Theory of Disease

apathy has settled in my heart

and in my bones

like a rare form of cancer

it eats at every cell of my being

it burrows into my marrow

consuming all I believed to be good

about you

about me

about the world

indifference is a sheath for my feelings

numbing any twinges of caring

but never halting the progression of my sickness

it will eat me up from the inside and leave nothing

but a shell

it was you

and you

and you

and even you

who gave me this disease

who left me with these symptoms

indicative of a greater malady

which left untreated

can bring about

the downfall of society

Posted in Poetry & Prose, Uncategorized and tagged apathy, depression, domestic violence, protecting my heart, self-esteem, self-preservation

Fiction, and other made-up stories

Sparklebumps: The Mother Version

Still histrionic, still a bookwhore; just faking competence because of my kid.

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