“Can you send my mail to such and such address in BFE, Kansas, please”. . . .this is the text I get from him this morning
“Oh, you moved home? What did you tell your parents?”. . . .yes, me playing dumb about him moving back down home, but knowing that the address he’s given me is his parents’
“the turth(sic)”. . ..he can’t spell for shit, when he texts “ain’t”, he spells it “ate”, but of course I wonder whose version of the truth would that be?? He has is own special brand of the truth, which doesn’t seem to come even a close to being accurate
“So you came clean about losing your job in April?”. . . .knowing he most likely hasn’t, because that would be a baby step towards wellness by getting rid of one secret, and he is buried under so many secrets I don’t know how he would ever dig himself out even if he could find a shovel
. . . no response from him, and I can’t resist, because remember, I am “the woman who doesn’t know when to shut the fuck up”, so I text him the following, knowing I won’t get any response from him, but that it will make ME feel better
“I realize you feel as though you owe me nothing, but a simple word of appreciation about allowing you to live in my home for 2 months rent free, plus me buying all food and beer, would’ve been nice. It would also be nice if at some point you could pay me the money you owe me for what I paid on the storage shed, the socks & underwear I bought you, & what it cost me to file your taxes for you.”
. . . .paused for about 40 minutes, then added the following
“You know at some point it would be nice if you would get some help & sober up so you could be around for your son. He worships you already & it would be great if you were actually the person he thinks you are. I wish I could have seen him ride the bike I got for him.”
I don’t think he even noticed that I never told him whether I would, or wouldn’t be sending his mail, but I am thinking that wasn’t even the point of the text message anyway. After all, he only gets bills, and it’s not like he is going to pay them. Plus, he could go to the post office and do a change of address if he was really worried about getting the mail. Him asking me to do it is a real crap shoot, because I’m not sure I really feel like doing it. My original point being though, that I think his purpose in texting me this morning was to dangle bait. He was fishing, trying to see if I would respond, and letting me know where he was at the same time. Nibble, nibble, I’m a fucking fish. He is an attention whore, and likes to keep numerous women on the string, just in case he gets lonely and needs a little ego stroke. It’s an abuser thing. And I know this, because I have been in this fucking pond before, but nibble, nibble, I am a fucking fish and I took the bait. . . .He wants to make sure he gets his mail, but he’s not concerned about all his tools and his tool box, which are still sitting in my garage??
I don’t know. Maybe I’m all wrong. Maybe he really doesn’t give two shits about the tools which help him to earn a living, and he’s more concerned about getting his bills and copies of Men’s Health which he can’t even pay for. And fuck forwarding those copies of Men’s Health, they’ve got some tasty smelling cologne inserts in those things, he ate (ain’t) ever getting them!!
**Be sure to chime in and let me know if I am thinking correctly about this, or if I’m just truly fucked up in the head.
Photo Credit: Flicker
Fat Bottom Girl Said What 