So you thought it would get better? You hoped he wouldn’t do it again? Stupid, so stupid girl. Why didn’t you learn your lesson the first time? One bruise wasn’t enough? It took a cut on the face and a fat lip? It took his hands around your throat knowing he wanted to choke the life out of you? Maybe it did. I want to be done. I want to be done with it all. Why can’t I just be done?
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Fat Bottom Girl Said What 
i had to delete at least 6 attempts to send you a message. if this is you…get the fuck out…NO ONE has the right to lay hands on you unless invited. How many teeth do you have to lose before its too much? How about a broken nose next time, will that be enough? I am desperately trying not to be angry and mad. But both of those emotions mask fear…because I’ve been there..and you need to get the fuck out…
It is me. These were taken after he dropped me at the house and left. He came back this morning to get some things and left again.
i hope you pressed charges
No, I didn’t. I just can’t do it. The sooner I have it over with, the better. Pressing charges only drags shit out, and really does no good except to piss guys off more. Plus, the cops in this town don’t do anything about restraining orders anyway.
go to the hospital and have it documented..or go to a womens shelter and have it documented
If this is you, I strongly urge you to seek help for this. Find a local shelter, call friends, seek out a therapist…anything. Nobody has the right to do this to you, especially someone who “loves” you. I hope you are able to muster up the courage to leave this situation.
XO.
Thanks Jen. I wanted to set his stuff on the curb last night, but didn’t do it. He was supposed to take everything today, but didn’t.
Please press charges and kick his ass out. NOW. This is TWICE now. No man is worth that and this is NOT love. He doesn’t need your friendship and support …he needs to be arrested. For the love of all things holy, please at LEAST kick him out of your house. He has nowhere to go? Oh well, Abuser should’ve thought about that. And as for you , being alone is better than this bastard’s physical and emotional abuse. He is taking advantage of you to start with and now this? Honest to God this buttlicker brings ZERO to the table. Kick him out, press charges, and never look back!!!!
I did not get the cops involved, but he is out of the house. I didn’t have to tell him to leave, he just left. Unfortunately, he still has keys, and I am trying to get those back. I don’t care if he gets his things, he just needs to get them when I am here. This is my house.
Oh FBG, c’mon now, you deserve so much better than this. Please listen to the advice of your blogger friends and leave this relationship that isn’t good for you in any way. Abusers are like child predators in that they don’t change. They just don’t. Don’t try to convince yourself that it’ll get better when he finds work or that he was just drunk or whatever. There’s never any reason to hit somebody you love like that. Just boot him out and get a restraining order to keep him away. Be strong! Good luck.
I am trying to be strong Don. I keep reminding myself that being lonely is better than being beat. I know he isn’t going to change. He is an alcoholic, and has anger issues. I think these are long-standing things that I can’t change. I like to fix shit, but know that I can’t fix him.
I hesitated to push the “like” button because it doesn’t convey what I feel, which is an extreme DISlike bordering on hatred. What I do like is the awareness this posts suggests, which is that you’re aware you don’t want, need or deserve this kind of shit anymore. We just talked yesterday about Takers and Givers. The only thing he is giving of is a lack of appreciation and pain. He’s a Taker, Hon. And he’s taking away your chance at happiness. I know you’re hurting inside right now with what’s going on in your life, but it won’t be healed by him. He’s only adding to the hurt — now physically as well as emotionally. You’re a Giver. Give something to yourself for a change and get rid of him. You deserve more than he can ever give you. I’m sorry, but it’s true. The pictures speak for themselves — and you.
Oh Ned, you made me cry dammit!! I know you are right. He is a taker. . .more than that he is a sucker. . .he is sucking the life right out of me, not to mention the money out of my bank account. I can’t do it anymore, and am physically exhausted.
It’s certainly never my intention to make you cry. But I’m glad you recognize what you’re NOT getting from this relationship, which are the essentials to a healthy life with someone — beginning with respect. You got rid of him once before, it’s time to do it again, FBG. For good. I know it’s hard to be “alone,” but better it be on your own terms and for the right reasons. Besides, with your WP family, you won’t truly be alone.
I know I have to be done, for my sake, and my son’s. I have been so wrapped up in missing my son, and trying to transition through that, that I saw The Cowboy as my cure to loneliness. I would much rather be lonely, than be hit.
You were probably both looking to fill a void — you for son, and him for his job loss — and it worked for a while, until you both reealized it wasn’t enough. The difference is that your realization was contemplative, and his is combative. Take the road that’s best for you and your son. Your feelings of being alone will go away and leave you open to someone who can appreciate you. Being in an abusive relationship only gets worse, and will leave you feeling just as alone — and battered. Show him the door, close it behind him and move on. You deserve so much more.
Thanks Ned. I know I have to do this for my son too. I haven’t let him come back, even though I still think that if he wanted to, he could get better. He obviously doesn’t want to, and I can’t make him want it. Thanks for being such good support! You’re like my own personal cheerleader, and you don’t even know me. Isn’t it funny how you can do that, having never met me, and he couldn’t even stop himself from hitting me after all the nice things I’ve done for him and his son? Ironic, eh?
Ironic. Tragic. Ignorant… the list goes on. The important thing is that you’re no longer on it 😉
This is so painful literally and figuratively. Gotta due your due diligence and quality control inspections before moving into a relationships. You are your own best protector.
I am my own worst enemy, and my picker is broke.
You are not stupid. It is thinking like that that is keeping you in this loop. You can break free, and you will. I do not know when or what has to happen for you to see sense but one day you will. As Don says Be Strong. I heard this song the other day and I think it will mean an awful lot to you. It’s called “I would be stronger than that”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=128sDWzzdFU
Sorry link didn’t work. I’ll try it again but if it doesn’t work just google faith hill I hope I’d be stronger than that. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=128sDWzzdFU
Thanks Tric!!
Oh Honey. I dated a real piece of work once upon a time. Then he put his hands on me one night, and I took care of my own business, got the hell out of there and never looked back. And all I will say to you is this: You cannot love someone out of being an asshole. No amount of you pulling and tugging will elevate him up to your level. He is just going to tire you out and drag you down. Like quicksand.
Just go. Please. xo
He is out of the house. Some of his things are still there, but I haven’t let him come back. I know it’s for the best, but it’s still hard. Thanks for being supportive.
Oh, Sexypants, PLEASE don’t let him do this to you again. PLEASE get out NOW. Go to a friend’s, go to a hotel, go anywhere so that you won’t be near him. Throw out his shit when he’s not around, get rid of him. Please please please. You don’t deserve this. Nobody does. I KNOW how hard this is, I do. But please, be kind to yourself—get out of this, get rid of him. Get help if you need to. Please just do it.
He is out of the house. I am not planning on inviting him back. He will only be back to get his stuff. I wanted all of it out on Sunday, but he didn’t come back to get it. I want it gone.
I’m high-fiving you right here, and also giving you a giant hug. How do you feel?
Thank you, because I need the hugs! I would like to high-five him in the face. I am a little embarrassed, because he pushed me over the edge, and I started hitting back. I am not a violent person, and hate that he brought out that in me!!
Absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. You were provoked and you reacted the way anyone would. More hugs to you!
Thank you HRH Madame Weebles!! I feel quite lucky to have such great blogger friends!! 🙂
Ugh!! I see myself in those pictures, in the pain of indecision, and the anger/frustration with yourself! You Do Not deserve this…no matter what was said or done by you. A real doesn’t resort to violence. I have never involved the cops. I have changed the locks, bought a gun, and moved to another state. Please be careful and know that I am here if you need to talk. Pictures of the abuse always serve as a good reminder for those weak moments. Stay strong!!
I agree, so I have all the photos, and anytime I don’t feel so strong, or am lonely, I will look at them. I don’t see any need to involve the police, as all it would do is prolong the misery. I don’t think he’s a stalker, but he is abusive. I think I will be fine if I just stay away from him.
Oh Hun
i wont repeat what has already been said so Instead i will ask…. how are you feeling? XxB
Getting by. This too shall pass. 🙂
Yes it will xB
Oh mama…. I am just catching up… with tears in my eyes…. SO much love for you….
Thanks honey. Working to get through it.
I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry that this has happened to you. I guess I hope you can grab hold of an idea of the good you deserve and cling to it. It’s hard to keep one’s head in the right place. IMO it’s better to be alone than with someone you shouldn’t be with. Take care.
It’s definitely better to be alone than to be physically, or psychologically abused. Just have to go through the process of getting over it. Thanks for your support. 🙂