Just once could you saying something nice about me?
Tell me something you like about me?
Something you find appealing?
Tell me why you want to be with me?
Because some days I wonder why you’re even here.
Surely you must think I have some redeeming qualities.
Oh, that’s right, you like my cooking and the fact I am always willing to suck your dick.
I’m the best fucking girlfriend ever.
Still histrionic, still a bookwhore; just faking competence because of my kid.
i've choked on my words for far too long
It's not the length of life, but the depth.
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Fat Bottom Girl Said What 
Holy crap, this sounds like something I would have said to my ex-boyfriend. Literally, EVERY SINGLE WORD, I could have written myself. It’s an awful feeling. Surely there’s something beyond the awesome cooking and blowjobs.
I would guess there probably is, but I’ll be damned if he tells me! lol He isn’t very good at expressing himself. I don’t need mushy, but every once in awhile it’s nice to hear something nice about yourself, isn’t it?
Outside of “Bud Light Lime, Chicken Wings and Blow Jobs”, “Apple Pie and Blowjobs” may be the best post title ever!
Thanks Don! Yes, I think those are the 2 thinks he likes most about me. He brags about the apple pie, and rumor has it, he brags about the blow jobs too!! lol
Well DAYUM! Go on GURL!
I’m with Don on that. I read the title and was like, “I’m in! This is gonna be awesome!” I’m sorry you wrote it because you’re not feeling appreciated though. Boooo to that. Maybe if you tell him what you like about him, and I hope it’s similar to what he likes about you minus the apple pie, he’ll be inclined to reciprocate. A little crafty perhaps, but crafty is good, eh? No well-behaved woman made history, or something like that.
Well, no one has EVER accused me of being a well-behaved woman, but that’s just fine by me!! lol He reciprocates, but he is a man of few words. Of course they say actions speak louder than words, right?? hahaha
ha ha even when its not his birthday??? 😉
Yes, even when it’s not his birthday! He’s a lucky guy!! lol
This just makes me smile.
Glad you came to visit!!
you’re welcome! i love your blog, dude!
It’s because you love the word “fuck” isn’t it?? hahaha
hey…I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t swear. it’s not NORMAL.
Well I tend to write just like I talk—peppered with expletives!! 😉
me too! mom washed my mouth out with soap when I was a wee one but it obviously didn’t work. thank fucking god.
Oh fuck!! I didn’t have suffer a bar of Zest in the old potty mouth, thank god!