Fat Bottom Girl Said What

When my ass talks, people listen.

Location, Location, Location

Whoever said places like Lowes and Home Depot are good places to meet a man is just a big, fat liar!!  My son and I ventured to one of these types of locations today and were sorely disappointed in what we saw.  Is it wrong of me to get my son involved in this?  Don’t jump to conclusions and think that I just bring any Tom, Dick or Harry around my kid right off the bat.  I don’t do that!!  However, I told him I wanted to do a little experiment today and scope some dudes at the store.  He was totally up for it.  He was quite nonchalant about it too, and didn’t point and comment about any of the guys in the store.  He waited until we had loaded up our purchases and were headed out of the parking lot before he said, “Mom, all those guys in there were kind of grimy.”  Most of them were also quite married, or old, or had HUGE guts, or a combination of all those things.  I am going to call a big strike-out on this experiment.  If my son, who can barely remember to brush his teeth without a reminder, can look at a guy and think they’re grimy, then I’ve got to agree with him.  So, guess it’s on to plan C, or is it fucking F or J by now?  I have lost track.

By the way, I have decided not to post an ad on Craigslist for a date for my Christmas party.  Here’s why–I perused the ads on there this morning, and I would have to say Plenty of Freaks (POF), is actually a step up from the Craigslist personals.  Now that’s really not saying much, but the farther you can get away from neanderthals, the better.  I prefer men who can put a sentence together.



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6 thoughts on “Location, Location, Location

  1. And at least you know the guys on POF can follow directions ad aren’t as lazy . On CL, they just have to click a link. That’s the ultimate lazy man’s dating site.

  2. Doesn’t really take a rocket scientist to follow the directions on POF either. From what I’ve experienced most of them do the bare minimum to set up an account, and try to get away with a simple “Hey, what’s up” as a correspondence starter. Can you tell I’m a little disgusted by my internet dating experiences?? lol

  3. You might want to reconsider. These are guys who really would enjoy getting a “Hunny do” list.

  4. You know they want the list to read thus:

    1. Do me on the kitchen table.
    2. Do me on the couch.
    3. Do me in the back seat of the mini-van.
    4. Etc. . . .

    hahaha. . .not that that’s necessarily a bad thing! 😉

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