Fat Bottom Girl Said What

When my ass talks, people listen.

Location, Location, Location

Whoever said places like Lowes and Home Depot are good places to meet a man is just a big, fat liar!!  My son and I ventured to one of these types of locations today and were sorely disappointed in what we saw.  Is it wrong of me to get my son involved in this?  Don’t jump to conclusions and think that I just bring any Tom, Dick or Harry around my kid right off the bat.  I don’t do that!!  However, I told him I wanted to do a little experiment today and scope some dudes at the store.  He was totally up for it.  He was quite nonchalant about it too, and didn’t point and comment about any of the guys in the store.  He waited until we had loaded up our purchases and were headed out of the parking lot before he said, “Mom, all those guys in there were kind of grimy.”  Most of them were also quite married, or old, or had HUGE guts, or a combination of all those things.  I am going to call a big strike-out on this experiment.  If my son, who can barely remember to brush his teeth without a reminder, can look at a guy and think they’re grimy, then I’ve got to agree with him.  So, guess it’s on to plan C, or is it fucking F or J by now?  I have lost track.

By the way, I have decided not to post an ad on Craigslist for a date for my Christmas party.  Here’s why–I perused the ads on there this morning, and I would have to say Plenty of Freaks (POF), is actually a step up from the Craigslist personals.  Now that’s really not saying much, but the farther you can get away from neanderthals, the better.  I prefer men who can put a sentence together.

 

Advertisements

Single Post Navigation

6 thoughts on “Location, Location, Location

  1. And at least you know the guys on POF can follow directions ad aren’t as lazy . On CL, they just have to click a link. That’s the ultimate lazy man’s dating site.

  2. Doesn’t really take a rocket scientist to follow the directions on POF either. From what I’ve experienced most of them do the bare minimum to set up an account, and try to get away with a simple “Hey, what’s up” as a correspondence starter. Can you tell I’m a little disgusted by my internet dating experiences?? lol

  3. You might want to reconsider. These are guys who really would enjoy getting a “Hunny do” list.

  4. You know they want the list to read thus:

    1. Do me on the kitchen table.
    2. Do me on the couch.
    3. Do me in the back seat of the mini-van.
    4. Etc. . . .

    hahaha. . .not that that’s necessarily a bad thing! 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Caffeinated Cyclist

emptiness personified

Dirty, Naked & Happy

is currently taking a break from blogging x

Playing for Time

"How did it get so late so soon?" ~Dr. Seuss

The Things I learnt

Happy Vibes ❤

Eye Will Not Cry

"Eye Fly High"

The Roar Sessions

A weekly series edited by Jena Schwartz

Ella Dawson

My business is generally pleasurable.

Beth Teliho

Read. Ingest the words. Like little blue pills, they will affect you.

kirilson photography

the stories behind the pictures, and vice versa

SAINTSWEST

Just my thoughts for all to behold

Book Snob

FOR DISCERNING READERS

An Obvious Oblivion Blog

🍃 Fully Living The Unfinished Things Of Life Through Writings. 🍃

www.immodiumabuser.com

AS I TOLD THE GIRL THAT I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO, THANKS FOR LAUGHING AT ME HERE TODAY.

Lou Times Two

top knot wearin' mama to twin girls

Sweet Spell

A baking and dessert blog.

Tangled Up In Music

Music Reviews (and other things)

Yeah, Another Blogger

An Arts-Filled And Tasty Jaunt Through Life

Budgie Bigelow's Blog

Finely crafted short fiction & stories

Annabel Vita

a little bit of this and a little bit of that

insert witticism

The home of Emma O'Brien

shatteredtalon's Blog

The musings of a scorpion who would have been an eagle

Buffalo Tom Peabody's blog 2

The 9 Lives of Buffalo Tom Peabody, Gunther Tootie, Ignatius “IGGY” Rattlebottom-Bunn, Larry "Bubba" Flowers & Doodlesack. NO AWARDS. please.

knowingkimberly

I blog now. I know, I can't believe it either.

Part-Time Monster

I eat books for breakfast.

The Reluctant Cat Owner's Journal

Gay humor writer writing about cats, cat care, life, and the adventures of being gay.

The Good Greatsby

Paul Johnson's comedy blog: I didn't get into comedy to be rich or famous. All I've ever wanted was to be loved...by somebody rich and famous.

Stop Me If I Told You This...

MUSINGS OF A SLIGHTLY NEUROTIC STORYTELLER

%d bloggers like this: