“Towanda”
There was one time I said “Towanda” and wrapped myself entirely in plastic wrap.
And he laughed at me. At me. Not with me. And I knew at that moment I’d picked wrong.
If you want me, you should know that story, because I am a fool, and I always will be.
When you come home from work I will meet you at the door with a drink and nothing on but an apron and a smile.
I will volunteer to pack you a lunch and leave a note in it telling you about all the things I will do to you when you get home.
I will stamp out our initials in the snow with a big heart around it and accompanying anatomically correct snow angels.
I will want to kiss you every time you walk past me in the house because lips seal deals with hearts that sometimes words can’t.
I will do a million things that either drive you nuts or make you adore me, but I will never give up until I’m absolutely forced to because I just can’t bring myself to do it.
Fat Bottom Girl Said What 
Where are the women like this? None near me…
Maybe you could advertise for one? lol
OkCupid?
I have no clue. I gave up internet dating long ago.
Good idea.