Cleaning Day
i scrub and scrub and scrub
my skin wears thin
from the scraping of the brillo pad
it makes no difference
i am still dirty
i add cleanser
i am still not clean
i put the bleach bottle to my lips
and drink
because i realize the dirtiness
has penetrated my soul
oh how it burns on the way down
and i know that must mean it’s working
but it doesn’t clean me
and only leaves a hole the size of a quarter in my stomach
you stupid bitch
i say to myself in the mirror
you disgust me
the scars he left have dug their filthy tendrils
too deeply into me
they are ingrained
maybe he was right
no one else will ever love me
Fat Bottom Girl Said What 